Happy Father's day to all the father's/mothers

What it means to be a father

This week is special in Cleveland as the city celebrates Marine Week through June 17th in addition to Father’s Day on Sunday. I want to say Happy Father’s Day to all of the father’s and the women who has to act as both mother and father.

I want to give a special shout out to my father, who I grew up admiring both in church and the business world. I am proud of me and my father’s relationship and appreciate all he has accomplished in life and for being there for me.

Many fathers are great dads who spend time with their kids and know the value of making sure their children know who they are. It’s important to know that your daughter or son will call you all night, asking what time are you coming home.

While listening to The Michael Baisden Show the other day, the topic of discussion was about parents getting it together for the sake of the children. I believe in that totally, no matter if you are separated or not. When it comes to the children, why not act sensible and put the anger and fighting behind you.

In some cases, grandparents tried to control and run the parent that was not theirs. It seems hard to believe that grandparents would teach children to dislike their father or mother.

My father started taking me to the Cleveland Browns games in 1964 and I have enjoyed those Sundays every season since. I often enjoy the laughs of how the bleachers use to be before it was proclaimed the “Dawg Pound.” We sat there each Sunday in the cold, laughing and watching everyone have fun.

I have so many great memories of growing up watching my father prepare for the Annual June Rose Festival (a church concert every Father’s Day) and was thrilled when I became old enough to work my first one with him.

Beyond church, I think it was him as a business executive that most impressed me. I enjoyed watching him work his magic as a banker at Central National Bank and then the Greater Cleveland Growth Association.

Having the heart to help the many Black entrepreneurs, he was – in my eyes – “the man.” He would take me around with him to Boot n Shoe, DK Marshalls, Kings Men’s Shop to name a few. He even arranged for me to work at the Fly Shop, a men’s clothing store downtown.

I recently attended the “Power to End Stroke” event and saw comedian George Wilborn with his son. He shared how he try’s to spend as much time with him because his father was not there for him.

I thought that was great that he would take his son on business trips with him so he would not be away from him so much.

I am sure everyone has their own way of what they are considering what makes a man a good dad. Man is judged by what they do or don’t do for the kids. Money is never the right way to decide if a parent loves their children.

Spending time with the kids can mean a lot to kids, not by how much you spend on them. I know that I always just wanted to be in my father’s presence, not just concerned about what he brought me.

I grew up just wanting to see him play the organ every Sunday at church.

Catching the bus downtown to go to the bank and have lunch with him and enjoying the time with him, now to me, all that was priceless.

To me, he achieved the “best dad” status for just being himself. Not all kids have great dads but most likely know the criteria they would vote on that would earn this acclamation.

Here are some insights I gained as a child that earn my vote for rating a great dad.

Again I say the time and love with your child means more than any dollar amount, where you judge buying them a big expensive toy may not mean as much as them calling you for a Happy Meal.

I have notice children are like dry sponges. They absorb everything they come into contact with. They share everything they hear. So no matter who is saying it and feeling happy about it, it’s not a good thing to do to a child who loves that parent.

Positive social interactions are learned at home. Have you ever notice most kids who act up in school have issues that stem from home. When a mother talks negative about a father the child love, it affects them mentally.

Science has shown that humans are visual by nature. We learn through sight before we do literal instruction. Using the sponge concept above, children’s capacity to mimic their world is astounding as witnessed in much of the role-playing they act out as children. We’ve all seen children play house and imitate the mommy and daddy figures in the role playing.

So in closing, just remember like there are no real super moms, there are no perfect dads. The great dad though is the one that makes sacrifices so that their children will not struggle to achieve what is innately in them.

This sacrifice doesn’t mean that dad won’t allow us to experience the consequences of our mistakes but neither will he allow our defeats to serve as a means to give up. The great dad pumps you up when you’re down, listens more than he lectures, and smiles at you when you least expect it. He does all this and more and you are never aware that he holds doubts of his own and is uncertain about the future until you yourself become a dad.

And because I knew this I will always love my father and enjoy all the time we have together, no matter what we are doing. Happy Father’s Day to all the fathers.